Today we are talking about Friends.  No—not the TV show that Pat has the whole 10 years on DVD, but real, breathing, people that we have been close to during our lives.

Everyone has them I suppose.  How do we get them?  How do we deal with them?  And most importantly . . . how to we keep them?

Sometimes we inherit them.  For instance, as my memory is telling me by sketchy thoughts, my folks went to school with Tom (Bud) and/or Bertha and they continued after school and marriage, kept in contact and maintained a close friendship.  As both families grew, they separated by distance with Bud and Bertha moving to Northern Minnesota near the Iron Ranges, and Ruth and Charlie (my folks) staying in the Minneapolis area.  Where I started remembering the relationship, as a small kid getting woke up in the dark of the night, sister Suzanne and I getting loaded in our Jeep Wagoneer and driving for four hours or more, up north, on gravel roads, weaving through the trees to get to Bud and Betha's home in the country.  At the time, they had a nice home in the woods that surrounded Swan Lake, in Pengilley, MN.  According to today's statistics, the 2008 population was 698 people. There were over 2000 in this incorporated town back when we were visiting, but we rarely left Bud and Bertha's land...too much fun.  One morning I was awakened by some noise outside and found my Dad (a very peaceful person) and Bud having a discussion with another man who thought he had the right to break into our Jeep and make it his.  Something was said later about that guy not knowing it wasn't his, because he had been drinking.  That was the only time there had ever been anything unpleasant happening there over the many, many years of visits.  In the following years, they moved across the two lane Highway/road and had a nice new bigger house built as their family was growing.  Karen, Char, and Pauline, and eventually, Tommy.  They had a chicken coop and fenced in area for them one year.  I remember it was my job to keep them ladies INSIDE the fence.  Outside meant they were Dinner.  I took my job seriously, because we couldn't eat them....they were their pets....or so I thought.  I got one cornered once outside, between the coop and the fence.  Did you know that chickens can fly?  Me neither!  As she soared over my head, one of her claws nailed me between the eyes!  I had a scar for quite some time.  As I remember right, that one also became dinner later in the day.

Dad would take us up there for two weeks, dropping us off, going back by himself Sunday night to return to the print shop and work the week, and returning the following weekend.  But our summer vacations were always great fun of exploring, fishing, running through the wooded trails, having a great time. In the fall, they would come down to the BIG CITY at State Fair time and stay with us a week right before school started again.  We would have another great time going to the Como Park Zoo, and other places that the city had to offer, besides renewing our friendships.  We were in essence FAMILY.

Time went on and our families got bigger as I got married to Pat. I took Pat to trip up to Bud and Bertha's one year and they had Shetland Ponies.  Being a city kid, I was not up on how to saddle a horse, but Pauline was!  Tommy, Pauline and I went pony ridding one morning...or should I say, almost went pony riding one morning.  Pauline saddled my pony, Tommy saddled his and I'm not sure if Pauline was riding or not.  I had mounted my sturdy steed and got it moving.  Started to trot toward the gate at the road, and then it started to run...right around this big bush.  As it swept around the bush, the saddle started sliding to the side!  I guess I landed on my back and knocked myself out, because as the story is told to me, Tommy was following me and his pony stopped sharply, throwing him over its head, which, Tommy being young and resourceful, tucked and rolled, hit the ground running, jumped the gate, ran to the house to get "MOM".  (Mom's know how to fix everything, you know.)  Next thing I know there is Betha staring down at me calling my name.  I guess she vaulted the three rail gate like an Olympic Athletic star. Seems when saddling a pony/horse, the animal bloats it's belly.  IF you, the saddler don't deflate the "puffiness" the saddle is loose (which is why the animal does that).  A loose saddle slides to the side of the horse, especially when the rider is going around BIG BUSHES!!!   That afternoon, I had a bruise from the top of my head to the bottom of my feet on the whole left side of my body from my abrupt landing.  I was up on a pony. . . that Tommy saddled, later on that day.  Pat was soooo proud of me.

A few years later, Bud and Betha and Family came through Vegas on a vacation and we were invited to their hotel room for a visit.  They had adjoining rooms and it was a very nice place.  While in deep conversation with Bud and Betha, Char came into the room and joined the conversation.  Now Char must have been a young teen at the time, and to me they were family.  To Pat she was a teenager.  On our way home after this wonderful and fantastic reunion, I asked Pat what was wrong...I could tell something was bothering her.  She said "Char". "What about her?"  "She was wearing BabyDoll pajama's!"  "You know, I didn't even notice!"  and I really didn't!  Family....sister...friendship.

Years later, Tom (Bud) and Bertha were out West helping a friend move and were dropping off a U-Haul trailer close by, so we picked them up and had dinner and visited before taking them to the airport for their trip home. After all these years, because of their wonderful, spur of the moment visit, I learned that Tom had been in World War II, and was the recipient of a Purple Heart.  What honorable service he contributed for our country.  A quiet hero.  Who would know what greatness walks among us if we weren't friends?

That is what friendship is.  Even with long term friends, we learn from each other all the time.  We depend on each other. It is a two way relationship.  True friends aren't afraid to share with each other in whatever joys or  challenges come your way.  Friends are there for you to cry on their shoulder.  You are there to be that shoulder to have them cry on.  You are there to walk with them through the tough times as well as through the good times.  Friends are to be highly valued.  Most of us have very few "friends".  What we mostly have are "acquaintances".  Friends are the ones we can talk tough to and give them a hug and kiss in the same one minute.  It is those that we cherish...the hard to come by and keep with friendship.  For me, even though I haven't seen Bud and Bertha, Karen, Char, Pauline and Tommy (he's called Tom now, no doubt) in many years, they are Friends, Family and much more.  Nobody can take them away from me.  What would be even greater is to visit with them now that we all have developed personal families of our own!  I have never met ANY of their families since we ALL came to that point in our lives.  Wouldn't that be great?  There would sure be a lot of catching up to do....glorious and marvelous catch up.

Point of this story:  We all need friends. Humans are built for friendships.  How are you doing on having and keeping yours?  My example is one of many years of building friendship that started with my parents.  Pat and I have a few more that have developed through our Daughter's relationship with the Matthews Family and with our Church family in Henderson, a couple friends that I developed when I worked at the City of Las Vegas, re-found a good friend from my Navy days,  my son introduced me to a computer game and has an audio communication application, and thru that, have made friends in actual physical as well as "talking" friendship with several folks....and now Pat and I are developing friends with our church that we are members of here in Tennessee.  God has provided us with the opportunity of a "support system" and He will provide the same for you.  Cultivate your friendships.              

Blessings,
Gary